To the Wife of a Deployed Soldier

My heart aches for you. For I know the true pain you are going through. I know the anxiety of watching your husband pack weeks before and wishing time would either pause or fly by.

I know the dread that the night before brings. Tossing and turning, can't sleep, but not out of excitement. Waking up that morning trying your hardest to keep it together at least until you see him off. The pain of kissing my husband goodbye while our child grows in my belly.

I know how hard it is to TRY to explain to your toddler that Daddy is going away for a long time, and no we can't go see him. I know what it's like to grip the rails of a hospital bed, in labor with out my husband standing by my side. The ache in your heart as you bring a new baby home and he meets his father via FaceTime. Or the bittersweetness of your child starting their first T-ball season but Dad's not there.

How everything in your house will decide its time to combust all at once. The dog will get sick. The kids will go through a huge tantrum/ test their limits phase. The washer and dryer quit working. Your ID card will expire. The frustration of getting a decent internet connection so you can see his face, hear his voice or even something as simple as a text. The rush to get to the post office on a Saturday because you forgot to send out his care package.


The friends who said they'd be there have gone on with their lives while your stuck in pause. Family "understands" but do they really? There is a BIG difference in missing your son, brother, or nephew than missing your HUSBAND. Your Army wife friends are probably the only ally you have, find your tribe and love them hard. But for your sanity, stay off the wives Facebook pages.

To the wife of a deployed soldier. 

YOU are so strong. Brave. Selfless. 

To keep the house going, kids alive, and picking up slack that comes with being a "single" parent. You are STRONG. 

To love a man thousands of miles away, without the promise of a homecoming.
You are BRAVE. 

To be in a marriage where the military comes first, and when he is called upon he must go. For standing by his side and loving a countryman.
 You are SELFLESS. 

People may think that this is what we signed up for. Sure. But we are also human, and you are allowed to feel sad or miss your husband. Do not EVER let someone discredit your marriage or feelings because you knew your husband was a soldier. What they don't understand is- we don't fear the distance. We fear them not returning, and if you are asking me to be okay with that, it's never going to happen. I "signed up" to love a man who sometimes loves his country more. I "signed up" to love a man willing to go to war and die for you.

I know it feels like the world is dragging right past you, and you will never see the end in sight. It's coming. The tears, the frustration, missing him will ALL be worth it the day he steps off the plane and is home again. Until then, hold your pretty little head up and make him proud!