How to survive as a stay at home mom

Y'all. The struggle of being a stay at home mom can be SO real. Sometimes this life can become so repetitive, and you feel like you are burning out at both ends of the stick. Trust me, I know. I have been a stay at home mom since I was pregnant with my first child, so roughly 5 years. I have had babies back to back, and my husband being in the military has proven to make this SAHM life even harder some days. 

One thing I have learned over the years is you don't HAVE to sink, heck, even drown in this lifestyle. You dont HAVE to loose yourself to your new motherhood adventure. Along the years I have learned so much about myself as a mother and staying home with my little ones. 

Find a routine. 

I know, most of you moms are probably thinking- yeah, no duh-Kodie! What I mean by 'find a routine' is really, find a routine that WORKS not only for you but for your children. For us, we wake up and head downstairs for breakfast. While the kids eat i use this time to clean up around the house, its the best time of day for me to get this done because they are entertained with cartoons and food. Easy, Peasy! Our oldest is in Pre-K so after breakfast/clean up I use the next hour or so for baths and getting the kids dressed for the day. Most of the time we literally sit at home so this is not something fancy, do not stress yourself over minute things. If we aren’t going anywhere that day we stay in comfy clothes. We drop Kyler off for school and head back home for lunch & naps. Soon after its time for sister to come home from school. And the day goes on with dinner and bed time. Obviously I am not going to go into every step of our routine because honestly, its pretty boring but a routine none the less. 

If you feel like your days are just crazy, chaotic and overwhelming I highly suggest implementing a easy routine for you and your family to follow. Tweak it to work for everyone! On days I know that will be busy I do a lot of things the night before. I will clean up the house after dinner, get the kids bathed and clothes picked out, diaper bag packed, etc. I have noticed on days that I have a heavy schedule, trying to get everything ready the day of sends me into panic mode which usually brushes off onto my children. So routine for us is VERY important. We need structure. 

Implement a Nap or Quiet Time. 

I know this can be hard for some kids, and if you have a child that just doesn’t like to sleep during the day, try doing a quiet hour. I have found that during the day I NEED this time of quietness. I need a break from the sound of cartoons, and bickering over toys (be real, you know you do to!) I have been very lucky in the fact that my kids LOVE to nap, they have all been really easy sleepers, but we are entering the age with my older two girls that some days they choose not to nap. On these days they are allowed to play quietly in their play room or watch a movie upstairs in their room but THEY HAVE TO “Take a rest” as we say. For their sanity and mine. A cranky, over stimulated and tired toddler is not fun for anyone. I promise you that. 

Don’t compare your life to other moms. 

We all do things differently. For example, my kids suck pacifiers, a lot of my friends kids do not. Does it make them any better of a parent than me, nope! We all do things that make our lives easier, and those things all differ from each family. Stop worrying about what so-and-so are doing in their home and wondering if you are doing it wrong. You’re not. Do what works best for your children and your home. You will drive yourself insane if you worry about keeping up with the parenting trends or what everyone else is doing. Find your parenting style, do what makes your kids happy and stick with what works for y’all. 

Remember, Its okay to have bad days. 

None of us are perfect, and parenting is not always peaches. Days are going to be hard. Your kids are going to test you, you are going to lose your patience (at least once) and that is OKAY. You are a human too. Sometimes it feels like we are supposed to morph into these perfect women who never get frustrated or upset after becoming mothers and I am here to tell you, that is just not the case. It is okay to feel the emotions of a bad day. Cry if you need to, go on a long drive listening to music to clear your head, anything that works for you- DO IT! But never forget you are an amazing mother and its okay to embrace the way motherhood can make you feel some days! Not every day can be a great day, and thats okay! 

This is a job.

I went though the emotions of not feeling like I was doing enough around our home finance wise. After years of sitting home and money being tight its hard not to feel this way. But. We have to remember that we are doing a job, staying home with our kids is our career for now. I am blessed to have an amazing husband who has to remind me of this more often than not. When the bills start coming in, the holidays are around the corner and you are wondering how the heck are we going to pull this together on ONE income, those thoughts of “am I really doing enough” come flooding back in. So I am writing this next paragraph for you and ME!  This is a full time job. We clean, cook, take care of children literally 24/7. One day I am sure we will all be back in the work force wishing for these days back, but for now, this home- these babies are our place of employment. And, even when its hard to see- we are doing enough! 

So, for any stay at home mom out there struggling to see her worth, or keep her head above water. Remember these few tips and that you are doing a great job! 

You are not your label.

Today we had an AMAZING service at church, let me start this post off with this- if you are in the Fayetteville/Fort Bragg and surrounding areas and looking for a phenomenal home church check out Crosspointe Church! Plan a visit!

So today we continued on our Christmas series which has been great, but todays topic of labels really, really sank in a bit for me. We all one way or another carry a "label" whether is positive or negative, one we have acquired by others or given to ourselves, we have one. Labels can be a nice thing to have when they are bringing our positive traits to the forefront of peoples minds. Cheerful, appreciative, friendly.. there are so many you could name off.  I've never met anyone who didn't like being known as something uplifting or positive. Its the negative ones though that I am going to touch on in this post. The negative ones that are hard to talk about, that hold us back from things. Things like, trying something new, reaching out to new people, a relationship with God.

Trust me when I tell you, I have been there. I have labeled myself as so many things. I wont give you the list, but just know- if this is something you have done or do, you are not alone. We have to learn how to rip these labels off! If you feel you are unworthy of a relationship with Jesus because of your past, let me tell you right now- you are so wrong. I know it can be hard to fathom that God could love someone with a rocky past but let me remind you of something- WE ALL FALL SHORT OF GODS GLORY. We could never measure up to the perfectness of our Savior. Never. Stop letting your "label" decide whether or not you are worthy. Because you are. You are worthy of love. Happiness. Forgiveness.

We all have a past. We all have something we have done that does not sit well with us. We all have something we may be dwelling on and not proud of. BUT. We are all so lucky to have a forgiving God. A god who cares more about walking with you in your FUTURE than dwelling on the mistakes of your past. You don't have to be cleansed of your past to walk in faith, you just need to believe and accept the love of Jesus Christ.

My husband and I were talking months ago once we started to attend church regularly. He was telling me how it was hard for him sometimes to be close to God because of his job. He is a soldier. He asked me, how could God forgive him for things he may need to do when at war? How could he really lean into his faith knowing the things he is trained to do to others? That he kept his relationship with God reserved because he would not be forgiven, basically.
I didn't have an answer for him, all I could do was pray and ask God to show him understanding and to guide him . Today listening to this sermon, it clicked.
My husbands label is "SOLDIER". There are many hard things he must do to ensure he gets himself and troop home safe. He has a job where he has to do things that go against the bible and God's word. His job though does not label him in God's eyes, when his day comes he can repent just the way we all can. His label does not hold him back from a relationship with Jesus.

If you are a just now finding your faith, if you are struggling with your past, I urge you to read this passage and always, always remember it.

Romans 3:23 

for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.

I Surrender | Living with a Threenager and "Terrible Two" Year Old

Y’all- I have the best kids, ever. They are compassionate to others, caring, have amazing manners for their age, CUTE but don’t let that stuff fool you, they. are. crazy!

I am home all day, every day, with my two toddler girls. Kyler is three and Charlee is two. You’d think it would be a smooth, simple task. That they would keep one another busy playing, watching their favorite princess movies, dress up, ya know all the normal things toddlers SHOULD do. Nope. Not these girls.


I am proud to be raising kinda independent young girls. I say kinda because they do rely on me for many things like food for survival and ensuring they wipe their butt properly after using the bathroom. But I think I get independent and headstrong confused when it comes to these two.

Before I became a mother I never knew how quickly I could be mentally over ran by toddlers. Physically at times too! They are master minuplulators, extremist, ticking emotional time bombs. And I have TWO of them walking around my home. DAILY! #jesusfixit

My three year old, bless her heart. She keeps me in line. She is my stubborn, older than her years, stern but sweet girl. She will say something so sweet like “mommy, you are the best mommy ever!” (Seriously, her exact words one time. #swoon) but then whip back at me with “you are so mean!” as hot tears run down her face because I forgot to get her a glass of milk for the seventh time this morning. She does things like color on walls or put eye shadow on our couch but blame her baby sister. Grabs toys out of her sister’s hand but profusely says sorry when she is caught. Has AT LEAST one PMS worthy mental break down a day leaving me wondering for my own sanity.

The two year old, lord help me.  No like for real. Help. This child y’all. She keeps me on my toes. She is tiny and MIGHTY! Not scared of a thing in the world. I used to see articles about children being found outside after wandering out of the home, and judge the parents. Like, how could you not know your kid left the house. Charlee gave me clarity on this. She will walk out of the house to go see the cat next door with no regard to strangers. Run out into the parking lot just because she knows it makes me crazy, and laugh as I chase her. If I ask her to do almost anything she puts her little finger up and request “one second!” She can climb pretty much anything. Walls, backs of couches, counter tops. If you see a news report about a young mother having a heart attack it was me! She demands coffee almost as soon as her eyes open, and lord help me if we are out of creamer that day. (Her version is milk with a splash of coffee cream)



Once you get these two together is a done deal. They will fight. Play. Run around the house. Gang up on me. Demand YouTube slime videos until they eventually pass out on the couch together. These girls are not for the faint of heart. They are hilarious to watch and be around and I am so blessed they are mine. No day is the same, each presents its own challenges and I question my sanity on the regular. They fight, they cry- a lot, they whine, and I contimplate waving the little white flag to surrender. Then I remember, they are looking up at me as an example. I need to teach them things like patience, understanding, and the list goes on. So yeah, they drive me absolutely crazy from day to day, but I cant imagine my life any other way.